His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Randomize
