that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
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