got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
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