if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
kristin has been a bad kristin
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
Randomize
