Sponge bath it is.
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
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