flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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