i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
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