You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Randomize
