So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Randomize
