I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
