return my video game
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
