hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
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