Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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