Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
Randomize
