Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
I miss vodka workout Fridays
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
True strength comes from lack of pants
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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