I made out with a fat chick last night in a hot tub... btw I am breaking up with you
that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
