Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
Rock
Scissors
Fuck
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
MIDGETS
????
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Randomize
