they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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