ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
so my phone autocorrects 'retard' to 'retaaahd'. i LOVE being a masshole!
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
Randomize
