He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize