Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
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