we're blogging at a bar
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Randomize
