just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
i just stumbled downstairs, still drunk, to hug my dad and wish him a happy fathers day
but fathers day is next sunday
i realized that after i threw up on his bare feet
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
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