i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize
