But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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