He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Randomize
