sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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