soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
Randomize
