I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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