i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
