I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
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