Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
So many bounce houses so little time
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Randomize
