how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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