ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
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