We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
