plz talk dirty to me
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize
