If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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