I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
Its about making memories worth repressing
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
Randomize
