Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
