So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
Sorry about my life...
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
Randomize
