just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
so much tequila, so little girl.
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
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