Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
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