yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
I have aggressive nipples.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
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