she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize