one word: firstdatebathroomanal
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
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