Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
I'm just crazy horny about you
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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