i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
