One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
