well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Randomize
