I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
Randomize
