I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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